i miss you.
i wonder when will i see you again?.


sometimes you do makes me fly high.
but sometimes you makes me feel trample.

never been update for quite long.

just got back some of my results.
i didnt do that well.
but must wait till collect my report book then i will know.
cos my result havent add my projects marks.
i did really study very hard for my chem.
but da results didnt come out that well.
well, kinda of upset.

i'm leading cell this friday.
i still dont know wad to lead.
i got some notes with mie already.
but i want God to use mie wad He wanna mie to share in da cell.
hope there is an impact to them.

recently i'm been reading this book " Heaven Is So Real".
well, is a very nice book. *both thumbs up*
there is some chapter that really made mie feel so upset after reading it.

in heaven, there is a hug room fills with babies.
why there're so many babies there?
becos these are da babies of mother who did not want them.

why they want to abort da babies?.
da babies is innocent!

God does not like abortion!
it is da one one of da worst of all sins to Him.

it was jesus who said this, " Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them". -mark 10.14.

and da book oso talking about Hell!.
those who never accept jesus in their life, they will have to go hell.
even if you're a good person. still you need to go hell.
and even those pple so-called "Christian". who dont really know God and who continually and willfully sin and dont repent before they die or before the Rapture happens will be enternally lost and will lead to da Valley Of The Shadow Of Death.

so sad if i will see my parents, my loves one and my close frens in hell.
i dont want them to be in hell.
they need to be save!.

I CAN MAKE IT THROUGH THE RAIN
I CAN STAND UP ONCE AGAIN
ON MY OWN AND I KNOW
THAT I'M STRONG ENOUGH TO MEND
AND EVERYTIME I FEEL AFRAID
I HOLD TIGHTER TO MY FAITH
AND I LIVE ONE MORE DAY
AND I MAKE IT THROUGH THE RAIN

this is wad shiao en mailed mie.
hahahs.. will keep this here in case i lost it.hahas..



hey Jia Wen,

Blessed 17th Birthday..!! it's only the morning of your birthday here.. but i know it's already night in singapore. =p so in order not to miss the timing in singapore, i've decided to type you a mail before i go for class, which is in almost an hour's time..

i'm sure you are very busy today, as in the last few birthdays. i rem the BBQ and other times we've celebrated your bday. but anyway, i'm sorry that i can't be there to celebrate your bday with you..=( i hope you'll have a fantastic year ahead.. may laughter, joy and strength be yours in the coming year. lean on God cos it is an impt year for you.. and may Prince Charming come too if it is in God's timing.. *smiles*

miss you girl and hope that when you see the ring that i got for you the last time i was in singapore, you'll always remember that i care and love you. God does too.. you're never alone.

hugs and kisses,

shiaoen

-For the moments I feel faint

Am I at the point of no improvement?
What of the death I still dwell in?
I try to excel, but I feel no movement.
Can I be free of this unreleasable sin?

[Chorus:]
Never underestimate my Jesus.
You're telling me that there's no hope.
I'm telling you your wrong.

Never underestimate my Jesus
When the world around you crumbles
He will be strong, He will be strong

I throw up my hands
"Oh, the impossibilities"
Frustrated and tired
Where do I go from here?
Now I'm searching for the confidence I've lost so willingly
Overcoming these obstacles is overcoming my fear

[Chorus]

I think I can't, I think I can't
But I think you can, I think you can
I think I can't, I think I can't
But I think you can, I think you can
Gather my insufficiencies and
place them in your hands, place them in your hands, place them in your hands

am so long never update alrdy.
i'm busy mugging for my exams yaa.

had fever since last friday till monday.
terrible!.now better.. my bad headache and giddy was killing mie that time.!.
so stressed.think i overworked myself alrdy!..

my bday is so near alrdy.
but yet i din feel happy at all.
i din feel excited or wadever that last time i used to.
i dont know. maybe bcos of exam yaa?. never think of my bday.
anyway.. is just a normal day yaa...

past this few weeks i din laught that often that i used to. _a gal wif a fake smile_
i'm really down. mean real down!
sometimes i feel lyk bursting out my crys. but i cant.
if i do, i dont lyk to cry infront of pple yaa...

rem 1+week ago.
i cried my way home after school.
i was so damn stressed up.
i control my tears not to cry in school.
deep in my heart i reali wish pple to comfort mie.
but in da end i turn to God for confort not human.
cos my God know mie da best... yea.

sighz...i got no confident that i can pass for my exam yaa!.although i got study!.

"i wanna seek You."
"i wanna desire You."
"i wanna loves You."
" All i want is You, JESUS!"

PS DENNIS came to church today!!.finally!.
i lead children church worship today. still scary.ha.but alright yaa..

after service went lil india today for lunch.ha. da food there damn nice!.ha.
ps dennis was there too... da fellowship was good.
i'm so happy. he's forever my fav pastor!.ha.
he will be in spore for next 3 yrs so must treasure him!.ha.

everyone is mugging very hard for exam siaa..
wad abt mie?. hais..
must start mugging alrdy.

mei hui just told mie that sab is gonna open chalet on dec!
she said, sab had invited him to come and he agreed!.
den mei hui asked mie to go oso.
but i'm surprised that my replied was " see how yaa"..
if normally i will say.. i want to go or other happy reply!.but this time am not....
think maybe cos 'my heart had alrdy grow cold'.....

*wait until my heart can grow cold*

wad a bad day i had today.
went all da way to harbourfront to go sentosa but in da end rain!
so head back home to slp. ha.
in da end overslept for youth service.
was lyk 20mins late.
den after youth. waited for JJ they all to finish worship practice den go for dinner.
in da end when they finished practice, my mommy msged mie said that she cooking my dinner alrdy so din have dinner wif them. head back home. neway, i lyk to eat my mommy's cook food!.hahas. nice *thumbs up* (:

think will go sentosa on tues?.ha.i wish ((:

hmmm...
yday i was quite upset.
hais...
i'm such a foolish freak!.
why i help you and encouraged you to dont give up da one you lyk?
still teach you wad to do!.
and mie myself still lyk you. isnt i foolish?.
i can feels that my heart is very pain yaa..
but i still support you...

dont you feel it?
sigh...
wadever.

you will never know... )=

life is never fair yaa..

yeshh..
if one day i can go heaven, i will ask God 'why life will never be fair?'.

went to circus yday.
was fun.not bad.funny.
was taking care of da KIDs.
da kids reali brighten up my day man. they're cute. i lyk kid!.ha.

wanted to go CHC for service tonight one yaa.
but in da end. i went home. cos i need to spend time wif my mommy. she will be going thai for her working re-treat. well, will miss her yaa..

only one word can describle how i feel now.
i'm "tired"....

just came back from austin hill yday evening.
had a wonderful 2 days 1 nite there.
wad if i can leave this place den will be so good that i wont be so stressed up.
took half day leave from da sch to go m'sia austin hill.
thanks God da sch allowed.cos actually must apply 7 days before da day.
i only applied lyk only one day before da day?. hahas...
but i missed those presentations. is 3 presentation! poa,chem and phy!.
but nvm yaa....

went for a swim at austin hill.
was very fun indeed.made mie forget all da problem.ha.
after da austin hill. when on da way to s'pore. we stopped at one shopping centre to shop.
wahs...i'm amazed that da shopping there is so lyk heren in spore. or even beta?.ha..got lots of stuff. next time i wanna go back there again!..hahahs...bring many many money.! ha.shopping!!hahhas.....

ohhyaa... jason got detained by da police when we crossin da causeway.
cos he brought a few packets of gum back.. hahas.. funny sia. thanks God, da police never check his CDs. hahahs.. must be jason look suspicious. hahahs... thanks God that He gave mie a innocent look.hahahs..


yday, while celebrating bday for my cousin.
his dad mean my uncle yaa.. he admitted to hospital.
bcos he cant breath normally. need to go for operation. is heart operation yaa!!!.
pray that my uncle will be alright yaa. not yet know when he will go for operation yaa.. ):


today children church celebrated children's day.had amazing race!.
was fun. mie and da others sheperdee in-charge one grp. lyk a daddy mommy bringing childrens out siaa.. hahahs.. indeed was fun! hahahs....
there was three grp played da amazing race.
my grp won da sec place. not that bad lar...anyway is not matter whether we won or not win. main thing is that we all did enjoyed alot!. hahas...

thought ps dennis will be coming to church. but never see him..
i so damn miss him...hais..
hope to see him soon. yea. reali hope.

well, after church went to bishan to slack. bishan is a BEST place to slack yaa..hahahs...
brought a skirt den mag brought a pair of cover heels.hahas. is very nice. cos is purple.hahahs...

think next week i cannot slack anymore.
must study alrdy.
neway gtg and slp alrdy.(: