My God's Enough

I've had enough of living life for only me
And reaching just for the things that keep destroying me
So sick of envying the lives of so many I see
Somehow believing that they have what I need

My God's enough for me
This world has nothing I need
In this whole life I've seen
My God's enough, enough for me
I can't explain why I suffer though I live for You
Those who deny You they have it better than I do
Cover my eyes now so that my heart can finally see
That in the end only You mean anything

Who have I in heaven but You
Nothing I desire but You
My heart may fail but not You
You are mine foreve

I'm not alright

If weakness is a wound
That no one wants to speak of
Then “cool” is just how far we have to fall

I am not immune
I only want to be loved
But I feel safe behind the firewall

Can I lose my need to impress?
If you want the truth, I need to confess

I’m not all right
I’m broken inside
And all I go through
It leads me to you

Burn away the pride
Bring me to my weakness
Until everything I hide behind is gone

And when I’m open wide
With nothing left to cling to
Only you are there to lead me on

Honestly, I’m not that strong

And I move closer to you

I’m not all right…that’s why I need you

Yanqin sent me this video, is a very touching one. Teared. haha.

God's unconditional love for us is amazing (:

ENJOY!

NO PRETTY CLOTHES FOR ME!!!!!!!

Went movie and mini shopping with mommy just now and had subway for dinner (:
Watched "AH LONG PTED LTD". Is a very funny show. Most of the languages they speak in that show in hokkian, cantonese, chinese and malay. 'Cause they filmed this show in malaysia. Some i dont understand so i've to read the english subtitle. Haha. Not bad movie, FUNNY!(especially Mark Lee)

NO PRETTY CLOTHES FOR ME NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A promise to myself, if i dont lose weight, NO PRETTY CLOTHES FOR MYSELF!

Im mad at myself, why eat sooooooo much then put on! I had lost some weight last year and now i putting all on back. I dont wanna look at mirror anymore lar. I feeling so depress now!!!

Im gonna starve myself!!!

I pray that God will help me to lose weight, AMEN for that!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MISS YOU

I AM SERIOUSLY MISS YOU!.

moody

SUPER very very MOODY today.

woke up in the morning already like that.
aww... just so pissed with myself but then i dont know why im so pissed with myself.
just, just dont know why... even ainsly also felt that ive been moody.


SOMEBODY PLEASE SAY... I LOVE JIAWEN, TO ME!

HAHA...


friends, dont make wrong guessing that i like ainsly or whatever.
we're just purely friend.
was telling meiyi yesterday that, im looking for a guy close friend. not bf kind, just a close male friend? Maybe ainsly will be one? haha. if i like a guy, i wont be even blog his name out.

missed two dinner today.
one of it is JJ's farewell dinner, the other is ling's bday celebration.
both is the surprise farewell and celebation.
If i not working today, i will have to attend one of it and miss the other one.
so maybe is good that i didnt attend both.

JJ is flying back to perth on tues, so sad that i cant send him off.
never mind, he will be back soon SOON!! And im meeting him tml after my work!
But im working 1030-10pm tml. bloody full shift. Hope i can survive tml at work, 'cause i am really very tired!! And winnie babe is not working tml, i will be damn lonely lar. Thanks God still have the hyper ryan and yati.

anyway, hope i will have good day tml!.

goodnight!!


OH BTW,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, WINNIE BABE!!
LOVE!!!!!

wtf

sometimes i dont know wth im doing.

i need to mind my language, i know.

been thinking a lot.

been emo will lead to depression.

okays.

think i need to slp, so i wont think so much.


goodnight!..

More of Him. Less of Us!

A thoughts that came into my mind during work.

less of ME/US but more of HIM.

If you didnt realised that in life, we always talk more of us than more of God.
Why not more of God but less of us?
When we talk to friends in our daily life, we always talk about the world things in life.

Example: You know arhh, recently arhh, i been msging with this guy arh. he so cute lor. he make me melt and so caring.. bababababa..

But why we didnt say things like that of God, if we really do say.. Is only with the christian friends but not to the non-christian. And this conservation will only struck there for a short while.

We can also say that..

Example: You know arhh, recently arhh, God have been so good to me leh. He's so so awesome lor, He talks to me and melted (soften) my heart!!!

If we always talk to peoples about God this way, im sure God will feel so loveeeee!!! HAHA.

And we need to repent before God that, we always thought that is a MUST for God to bless us. What i mean is.. We always think that is righteously for God to bless us and when we're succeed, got what we wanted, do we really thanks God?? We just think that is bcos i work hard and gain it. Or we just forgot about it.

Well, be thankful always! Thanks God 24/7 (even in ur dream. lol)

happy V day!

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!

Muffin's baking was great, but tired. Started at 930pm and only finished at around 430am. So didnt have enough sleep. 'Cause i got work from 12-10pm today. I spent my V day at work today.. Im so happy, my colleagues said that the muffins is delicious! :D

FINALLY FINISHED!!

I received a bouquet of twelve roses today. They send it to my work's place, it was so embarrassed. And it didnt state from who. I guessed is from that person, truthly is really from him.. Hmmm... The only thing i can say is " im sorry". i dont want to say anything that hurt you, the only thing i can do is to remain silent and pretend nothing happened. 'Cause i still want you as my friend. I dont want to avoid you, because i believe that we are both mature enough to deal with this.

Thanks for the roses, my friend.

There is a class gathering at Mr low ake xiao wen's new house this sat for cny visitation. Its a yearly thing. Realised we always gather at the start of the year and the end of the year. I'm glad that we all still manage to gather together after we gradurated from our secondary school 4 years ago. Seriously, i missed Seconday school life. Was a great one (: Looking forward for the gathering day :D Hope that our friendship wont just stop here, will continues and continues. May God bless them, my best ever classmate year 2001-2004 (:

Year 2001-2004 Agape

Faith is tired, she need her beauty sleep *yawnn*.....
GOD BLESS.

OMG

OMG!!!!

i just got a heart-attack!

Received a msg from someone.
Hmmm... I am stunned, dont know what to reply.
Actually i already knew that he like me.
But i didnt know that that he will express it......

Tell me is not the true.
Tell me you send wrong msg.
Tell me is a joke.

I will be damn happy if you tell me all this!
Dont stress me, pls!..
We will always be friend.YEA.

This two sentances "We will always be friend" or "I always treat you as friend", is a hurtful sentance to reject people. I know how is feel, 'cause someone used on me before. And i was hurt. To be deeper in love is easy, but to be recover from hurt is hard. So why does so many peoples still wanna fall in love? Haha, I also dont know why. ' Cause im admit im one of them. :/



When You Say Nothing At All
By: Ronan Keating

It's amazing how you can speak right to my heart
Without saying a word you can light up the dark
Try as I may I could never explain
What I hear when you don't say a thing

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall
You say it best when you say nothing at all

All day long I can hear people talking out loud
But when you hold me near, you drown out the crowd
Old Mr. Webster could never define
What's being said between your heart and mine

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall
You say it best when you say nothing at all

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall
You say it best when you say nothing at all

nothing to do

Well, i've nothing to blog about but yet i still feel like blogging. Haha.

Oh i went for prayer meeting just now, i cant rem when was the last time i went. Think very very long ago. Ha, during prayer meeting.. I fell asleep. (oops) 'Cause too tired.

V day is coming.. Hmmm.. Gonna meet Joy tml in town to buy Valentine's stuff then head to her house to bake muffins? Haha, i have never bake muffin before and tml will be my 1st time. I'm gonna bake for my colleagues in APRG and AHER. Hope will turn out well (: Told Ainsly that if i ever i've a boyfriend, i will let him be the 1st to try my baking skill.. Ha, then he replied: "then i'll pity your bf, cause i guess he will get a bad stomachache. haha". AHYO~! WTH. He's just jealous that im not baking for him. Just too bad, he's in jungle feeding mosquito till saturday. He can bake (shit) himself in the jungle. (oops). :x

Talking about muffin, my bro is a chef. He cook very delicious food. Haha, i think he like to bake cake. Seriously, im proud of my brother. He's handsome! LOL. But yet no gf, sometimes i wonder is he.. GAY? Haha, i know he's not lar. 'Cause i think he got someone he like already. And so far in my whole life, i never see him having any girlfriend before. Haha. Wah, what am i doing? Promoting my bro? haha, i should just say all the bad things about him! Haha. He will be bloody damn shock that i posting about him. Think he dont have blog's add. So no worries....

THIS IS MY BROTHER!

Got all this photos from his friendster...

Among all i think my bro is the most handsome one.

you think?

This is what he wrote in his friendster, "be nice to nerds, for all u noe they might be the next Bill Gates! hahas!!" Dont know my bro can be so cheezy too.LOL.
This is the shop he wish to open! Haha, i love it too! If he ever open this pinky's shop, probably i will drop by everyday!!! HAHA..

And OH!!! ELVIN AND ME!! HAHA, actually i photoshopped!! MY FAV ACTOR! When i 1st saw gideon.. i think gideon look kinda like him! haha.. NOW i think... HMMM.. still OKAY lar. Maybe on the other picture. (:

EDISON CHEN

Edison is in a deep deep trouble.... AM KINDA DISAPPOINTED (although im not a fan of his). Didnt know he's so wild. LOL. Alright, i feel sad for all the actresses that involved in this sex scandel. Stupid edsion lar, who ask him go and repair his PC and forgot abt all his wonderful and sexy's videos and pictures are all still inside. And that kiru will be release all the pictures in another few more hours? I think he's sick lar, PLEASE stop it, hurting more and more actresses that involved into it. AHYO. And Nicholas is gonna divorce cecilia. sad thing.

BTW, why i am so into it? maybe i too boliao already. alright. stop it now.

Drunk

Sat's night was... AHEM.
I didnt know i will get so drunk.
Vomited and falling all over like some dead shit and only reached home at 5am in the morning.
I only really awake when on the way home, and my dad was waited down stair my house for me (dont know how long he waited for me, 'cause he dont know what time i'll be home).
And yea, my phone was no batt at 1am so nobody can contact me. When my dad saw me, i acted like normal. But i know he can see that im kind of drunk. The most difficult thing is that, i've to act awake and not drunk. Talk normally and all.

Even when im in a high mood, i prayed to God. Asked God to protact me and don't let me get into any trouble and of cos keep me awake. Well, im half awake. Infact i know what im doing. Just my body is weak. I know i had talked a lot of rubbish.lol. And i falling all over, so now i've a lot of blue black all over me. *painful lar* especially my hip bone and shoulder back.

Thanks God i make it to church, though i am so super tired. Dont wanna miss church just bcos of this.

Oh, im happy that he cares a lots. really.
All i know that, we can only be friend.
'Cause he's not a christian. I've to guard my heart well.
Im human, sure have feeling. So when the feelings come straight onto me, i've to cut it straight away. 'Cause i love God too much that i cant bare to disobey Him and i need to be right before Him. THE LOVER OF MY SOUL.

So V day is coming... But i will be working almost full shift that day. Haha. Purposely one lar, let those peoples who are in the relationship to go celeb. As for me, i will just work lar. Haha, V day is nothing special. Just a day... To tell your Love One, how much you loves them and be romantic about it. haha. Well, there's no need to just tell your love one "how much you love them" just during V day. Can say it anytime, anywhere when you really feel like telling from the bottom of your heart. haha.

im listening to the CDs (3 albums) my mommy brought home. All love songs. Haha. Very nice.

She will be loved, When you say nothing at all, How do i live, Un-Break my heart, Love is all around, Touch me in the morning, Love me for a reason, Cant fight this feeling, The things we do for love.....etc.......


imagine me playing all this songs in my shop?
..........i think i will fall asleep. LOL.

Happy CNY!!!

Happy Chinese New Year!!!!





GONG XI FA CAI!!!!!!







Had reunion dinner yesterday at home, was a fast one. Less than 1 hour, consider fast? Ohya, dad cooked. No steamboat this year, just many dishes with rice. Then after that celebrated Alexis's (my lil naughty niece) 3 years old birthday. Her birthday is today (according to the chinese calander, if Eng one will be 9th Feb).

One of the photo i just found it in my PC. Kinda cute, but this photo very long ago already.

After all the celebration, went online. Chatted with Ainsly, and both of us compained that we got nothing to do and is so bored to stay at home especially on the cny's eve. So eventually he asked me out for movie at grand cathay. So we went. Yeah, we watched CJ7 by Stephen Chow. We met at 1030pm (supposed to meet at 10pm, but im late. OOPS) and our movie time only started at 1.40am so before the movie we have like ard 3 hours. So we went to startbuck for coffee, i had ice blended mocha and he had some weird drink that i dont know (look kinda in orange and pink). So we sat there and chatted until 12 plus then proceed to cathay to wait for time to pass, while waiting, he bumped into his officer. His Officer told us a lame joke lar. He asked us.. "Bread" and "coffee", who can talk more? Then i was like... Hmmm.. "Coffee". Then ainsly also chose "coffee". Then the Officer told us is...... "Bread".. Why? 'Cause "Breadtalk" mahs! Then i was like... Damn lame lar he. Haha. Anyway, must thanks him for his lame joke lar. 'Cause at lease he made us laughed to broke our sleepy-ness. Heh.



Yeah, back to the movie. Is a funny show lar. Can go and watch, haha. Especially the kid that call "dicky" in the show. I loves his expression! He is GOOD. Such a young age he is, he knows how to act the expression out is already not bad. Haha. And the CJ7 is very cute too, think not long later, they sure sell the CJ7's soft toys around.

Hmmm... Im kind of surprised that ainsly and me went out. 'Cause we seldom chat, even back in CHEC, we dont really even say "hi". Haha. I remembered, i always think that he's a "cool" person that you cannot mess with. 'Cause he look "ah beng", haha and many of his kakias will follow him around. But after really got to know him yesterday, he's okay lar. Not really very "ah beng", perhaps is just his looks. After an outing yesterday, we still SMS. This is when a friendship started, although we known each other already 2 or 3 years back. But this is for real. A friendship that starting that ends dont know when, haha.

OH, 1st day of CNY was BORING. really got nothing to do. I just went to my uncle's house for visitation. Everyone gathered there, so no need to go every homes for visitation. Save time and save money (no need to take cab here and there, as ya know cab's fare is so exp...). Another day of visitation tml, wondering if i've time to go boss's house for visitaton? Haha :D Hope tomorrow visitation will be great. Alright, got to go. Relatives just rang my house said that they coming now, so last min notice. Haha.

ENJOYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!

headaches

ahyo, don't know why feel so sian.
like got nothing better to do like that.
infact i got many many things need to do.
wash my clothes, clear up my stuff... but i am too lazy to do. hees hees :/

Im feeling so sleepy now when now is only 10.40pm!
oh im so surprised that i slept damn early yesterday. i slept around 12am plus. ehs, is consider early to me. 'Cos normally i sleep at around 2,3,4am.. haha. Think i am very tired, thats why.

Well, Gid left this morning already. Hmmm... Fangyi is so emo, he's sad that gid left to aus. Anyway, in 9 months time, he will see him lar.. To me i guess im alright, 'cos we only chat in MSN, not like them.. they meet and see each other and they know each other for ages?. Yea, i will see him (if possible) in Dec? Hope so..

Hmmm.. if one day, im able to leave to oversea and study, i will be very happy and excited. Of cos i will feel sad that need to leave my LOVED ONEs. But thats part of life, everyone have to move on. Im not a homely person, i loves to travel. I always want to be independent, dont like to relay on others... friends or family..etc. And now im facing this prob, dont know if i should work full time or part time? The course im wanna study will cost me $4700++ for just 6 months.. Is so exp lar. Dont know how am i gonna pay for all this, of cos my mommy would want to pay for me.... but i dont wanna to burdens my mommy lar. $4700++ is not a small sum of money lar.. Im not from rich family, evermore my dad is not working already. So only left my mommy is working. Thanks God both bros and me are already stepped into this working world. So my mommy no need to support us. For the past 1 plus year, i been living on my own. So now I really dont want to use any money from my mommy, she had spend a lot on me already. Especially on my private Sch for 2 yrs, im such a let down.

Okays so now... i've to choose.
The course:
Full time will be Wed, Thurs 10-5pm.
Part time will be Mon, Wed, Fri 630-930pm.

if let say i take Full time course, ive to work part time.
if let say i take Part time course, ive to work full time.

So, if i work part time, i think ive to live on bread. (lol) but i might not be able to attend youth service. Unless i can find an office's job tht have part time.

So, if i work full time, it will take longer time for me to complete my course and yesh ive to change my job to an office job so i can allow to go for my course after my work.

but but but... if i have to take the course, i wont be able to go for Church Camp and Youth Camp at the mid and end of the year. This is what i am concerning about. Well, what andrea and ling says, have to give up on one of the thing. They rather me attend the course than Camps.

Well, im really dont know lar. The in-take will start on march 20th, the next one will be on June. Most probably i will choose the June's in-take. March's in-take is too rush for me. I havent settle so many things..

AND OH... My two goodbest frens wanna go Bangkok on april. And they included me!!! OMG, i seriously dont wanna go. 'Cos ive to save and bangkok to me is sooo boring now. 'Cos i just went during ends of Nov last year. If i wanna go, i'll wanna go HK or Aus! But they're so serious about it, they even requested off day from their work's place already. And if i reject them, they'll probably be very angry with me. 'Cos they wanna go for holis with me together, it will be the 1st holis that we will be going. Awww.. How am i going to tell them? Everything is not settle yet. My work, sch...etc. And there's church camp in June, you think i can take so many days leave mehs? ahyoooo... HEADACHES arhh!!! HELP.



i know my God will provide. (:

its okay, its alright

its okay, its alright. its okay, its alright.
its okay, its alright. its okay, its alright.
its okay, its alright. its okay, its alright.
its okay, its alright. its okay, its alright.
its okay, its alright. its okay, its alright.
its okay, its alright. its okay, its alright.
its okay, its alright. its okay, its alright.
its okay, its alright. its okay, its alright.

its okay, its alright!!!

cut and dye

Went to cut my fringe and dye my hair straight after the chalet.
Cut at hairprofile. hees my fav though is sooooo exp to cut there.
i didnt know that the price had gone up until nesley told me when i called the salon.
Now the price had gone up. just to cut fringe actual price is $10. then now $20 already!!! My gosh!! If the whole hair.. student actual price is $35 then now $45!. wow... exp lar!!

HAHA, i had a free hair cut for fringe. hee, happy!
the convsation i had with nesley..

ME: hey nesley, faith here. i wanna go and cut my fringe later, will you be there?
Nes: Yea, the price gone up by $10 already lehs.
ME: huh? $10? Thats mean $20 now? then if wanna cut whole head one how much?
Nes: $45.
Me: wah, so exp arhh... HOW? i just let you cut my whole hair one month back only lehs, no hair for you to cut already... i just wanna cut fringe.... Nvm, i call you back again, let me decide.
Nes: ahya, you just come. i help you trim a bit.
Me: trim? $20 lehs, nvm lar.
Nes: just come will do..
Me: okok..

then i went, i still dont know he will chage me free. haha, when im gonna pay at the counter, he was like.. go go go, no need (wishpering). hees, kinda blessed. no need to pay. im his broke regular customer mahs. He really cut very nice hair. (promoting him now) He's a malaysian too.lol. realised those very good hairstylish is all mostly from malaysia. Means malaysia got many good talents.HAHA.

After that went to sis-in-law's mother's slaon to dye hair..
I couldnt say their skill is very good lar. Thats why i rather spend more money to cut at hairprofile. hees. I just go there and dye hair. Dye and highlighted.
Hmmm.. I dye brown and highlighted purple. kinda weird colo combined. haha, just try lor.
actually i was so super worried that the colo will come out very funny lar. cos PURPLE!! and kinda regret to chose this colo. i was praying all the way, even just a small tiny thing i still will pray. haha. Thanks God, the colo came out OKAY. cos not so obvious.... I LIKE IT, prefer darker hair now. She charged me more this time round. last time she always charge me $30 now... $50. Actually okay lar, cos my hair is long.

Putting purple highlight.

Now the whole hair dye.

how i look like, from this pic.. cant see the colo.

ANYWAY, I LIKE IT CAN ALREADY (: